I got a new toy last week: a stick shredder.
I had intended to buy something that would shred leaves.
Our yard is surrounded by big trees - oak, maple, hickory, sassafrass, elms, sweet gum. Mostly sweet gum. If you've ever lived with a sweet gum, you know the deal. Sweet gum trees drop prickly balls - lots of them - that are nearly indestructible. Step on one just right, and you'll roll your ankle. Step on one barefoot, and you'll cuss. Our yard is littered with them. If you don't get them raked up early (we never do), rain will beat them into the ground. But they don't all fall off at the same time (the bastards), so you either have to rake ALL THE TIME or wait until spring and rake them all up at once. You'll miss some, though, and they're like missiles with the first lawn-mowing.
But I digress.
Leaves.
We have a lot of them. They carpet the yard and pile up in drifts around the house. Several years ago, we bought a yard sweeper with a hopper that we pulled behind the lawnmower. It did a fairly good job of picking up the dry leaves on top, but it wouldn't get the wet ones or the compacted ones or the sweet gum balls that weren't right on top of the ground. We eventually gave up and parked it way out back under some trees. Last year, an ice storm broke a limb off of one of the trees, and it fell straight onto the yard sweeper, flattening it into a pancake. We weren't using it, anyway.
So we rake. And rake. And pile the leaves and sweet gum balls onto a tarp, and drag it to the gully and dump it, and go back for more.
I know what you're thinking: Compost those leaves, ding-bat.
I could tell you some horror stories about my composting attempts, but I'll spare you.
Anyway, I bought this shredding machine (Earthwise 15 amp electric chipper/shredder) thinking I would shred some leaves and dump them in the low spot in the vegetable garden. Though this machine does a really good job of chipping limbs, it ain't for leaves. Oh, it'll shred them very well, but you have to stand there and stuff them into that narrow opening with the plunger stick that comes with the machine. It takes forever. And if they're a little wet, they clump up inside the machine, and you have to unplug the machine, raise the hood, dig out the debris, and start again.
The Husband came outside while I was testing the machine Saturday morning. He watched for a few minutes as I was trying to jab leaves down that little opening, then he went inside and ordered a LEAF shredder.
Meanwhile, I dragged the wagon around the yard and picked up sticks and limbs, thinking it'd test out the machine's limb-grinding capability. I was impressed (this is not a paid advertisement). It comes with a good-sized tub to catch the debris (10 gallons, I think). It is a limb-grinding fool, given the right-sized limb (max. 1.75" diameter). The little ones you have to punch down with the plunger, and you have to dispose of the too-big stuff some other way (into the gully they go). But my wagon-load of limbs rendered a tub full of little wood chips tout de suite.
It was kind of satisfying. I took the wagon around the yard a few more times and spent about 3 hours picking up limbs and grinding them.
My plan was to grind sticks until I had a yard wagon load of wood chips and then dump them on the low end of the garden. (I question that plan, given our earlier experience with the leaves, but that's another discussion.) The plan did not consider how heavy a wagon load of wood chips might be. You may recall that my garden is in Nanny's back yard, and that her gravel driveway is long, and somewhat rutted, and this time of year it is littered with sweet gum balls AND pinecones. I wrestled that heavy wagon across all that mess and finally made it to the garden. My next few wagon loads were not so full.
By the time I quit grinding and hauling, I'd spent enough time in the yard to notice what a shit-pile it had become. Old flowerpots, brittle plastic lawn chairs and lattice, various broken-down crap. When I dumped the last load of wood chips, I came straight back to the house and started pitching jjunk into a pile. When I figured I had a truck load, I went inside and said to The Husband, "Put some shoes on. We're going to the dump."
It made him grouchy. (In his defense, he's got a Man Cold and isn't feeling all that great.)
To soothe him, as we were leaving the dump, I mentioned buying a shed for his tractor. The Husband was excited enough about getting a shed for his tractor that he cheered up a little, and instead of coming straight home from the dump, we toured the garden shed places along the highway, looking for a shed for his tractor and one for my craft junk. (Yes, I have enough to need a shed for it. I could give it away, but I plan to use it all when I retire. For real.)
So we drove around for about 30 minutes. Most of the shed places along the highway didn't have an attendant or any signs that hinted at prices. Finally, one of them had a box of flyers on a post. I asked The Husband to stop so I could get one.
When I tried to get out of the truck, every joint, bone, muscle, and tendon screamed with pain. It was worse yesterday morning when I got up. I figured the best remedy was more exercise, so after breakfast, I put on my gloves and went out to rake leaves and sweet gum balls, for there's a LEAF shredder on the way, and I wanted to be ready to shred when it gets here.
There are piles of leaves and gumballs all over the front yard.
And today it's raining on them.
